think_confidentiality

Wow! What a tiring start of the week.

Alas, i have completed 2 duty clerk(s) in a row. Woohoo. Tiring sia.

Mr Eric's leaving on this friday and he is currently clearing leave. And my mdm appointed me as In-charge. Aiya. More saikang sia. And the new IC will only come in nxt month. Alemak!!!
Anyway, i tink i did a bad thing of clearing leave from next week onwards and doing combo. I will most probably be called back by my 'incek' to do work since Mr Eric leaves and incek, handling 2 branches, is standing in temporary. He is also new to the system too. Alemak!!! Headache to the max.
My team got a meeting with mdm mary today [her talk's a bit tiring and exhausting]

Wanted to do my work but the system keeps screwing up. Fed up.

Time for another battle tmr.

Tired me. Can't wait for tis friday and nxt wed. haha. Night activities coming up. Haha.

Air con down in the office. Fucking hot sia.

It's lyk oven.

我累了。我真的累了。

事情一坡为平，一坡又起。

Everything started out fine except for some crappy data that we need to churn out. But all this is okay as long as there's no complains. Encik gives our team a meeting for update of what is happening in our team since he is taking over us in a few weeks time. It's rather pity for him that he has to take care of 2 branches and he is unknown of anything at all. But it's nice to have him around though.

Everything went well until at 5pm when boss came out and asked who is the one handling this unit. It's 5pm, a time where i thought i can go home peacefully on a Monday. I went into his office and he told me to tell him what happened. Fuck!!! Damm fuck up. Another complain case and it's the 3rd one in 2 weeks. I can't believe it. Depressing and pissed at myself.

Why is it that when people got approved for their case and they still complain. Fuck up. And for this case, it does not entirely concern me at all. It's just that he is under my unit and i am take charge of the unit. i didn't even see the case at the beginning. How it started, i also not sure. All i noe was how it ends.

The thoughts of AWOL-ing/ hurting myself starts to flood my mind. No matter how perseverance I am, the more i can't take it.

I may be smiling at times but my smile started to fade. I find my smile becoming fake. I just smile for the sake of smiling. That's what i feel on the train just now.
It's such an irony... i was telling my friend last month, that i smile to make other people happy and now i found my smile to be a fake. People feel happy, but i feel depressed. The paradox of life. You can be happy sad at the same time.

Life's bad for this week and for the following weeks though.

I got scolded twice in a week right in front of everyone. What the fuck!!! All just because of complains posted in the forum and as well as to some higher authority. Why am i the one/my team always suffer the complains and not the others from other teams. It's just too unfair.

Why are people scared to scold the higher authority instead of pushing the blame at us saying we (the small fry) are at wrong all the time? Aren't they supposed to get blame too since they took such a long time to make the decision. I meet the timeline for doing the cases and sending it to the decision maker for his approval. It's him who takes his time to reply back to us even though the system has been sending reminder to him to make decision. I am so fed up. Me get scolded and blame and the decision maker can sit down and relax in the office.

Now, my boss has a very bad impression of me, as of what i think, even though of what i did previously.

As of what my IC says, one wrong move you makes will alter the good image you create previously.

My friends also told me, the higher you goes, the greater you will fall. Now, i falls pretty hard and it's very hard to pick it up again.

Now, i am much of a comfort now after some thoughts and as well as my friends. It will be a long fight for peace for this month especially when the boss wants to see everything and every minor work processes so that we can cover our backsides. Stupidity is everything in my unit.

Happy deepavali to all the Tamil !!!

I am not sure what to say today. My life started to fill with a bit of colours, not my medical condition. Since June, I has been either injured or in pain all of a sudden. First, my ankle got sprain. Then, got a serious coughing. After which, my hands and legs got scratched marks. AFter that, is my toothache, which leads to a extraction of wisdom tooth. And now, my finger got a bit of sprain from soccer. What a unlucky year for me.

Another wisdom tooth extraction on next wednesday. But it may be postpone due to my sore throat since my last extraction.

As for my life, had been reading books and learning guitar. Other than that, i am either playing games or watching anime. Recently, I am hooked on 'Gundam 00' and 'Gundam Wing'.
My verdict: U can't stop watching once you starts. Hehe.

Long time nvr write "Joke of the day" liao.
Boy A picked up a call but the call was meant for his colleague. He asked the caller to hold the phone and he call his colleague, Boy B.
"Boy B, your call." Boy A shouted across the room and paused for a short while.
As Boy B came towards him, Boy A continued," You have entered the MATRIX !!!"

Credit from KK in my office. The above scene is real and is proven funny from the laughter received.

To be continued... ...The aftermath.